No Worries
Or at least not really bad ones

by Rachelle Disbennet-Lee, PhD.

I am not much of a worrier, but even I have to concede that I have a few. Given that admission, I find myself very curious about a saying that many people seem to be using of late. It is a phrase I first heard twenty years ago when in Jamaica. It seems to fit in the islands where worry truly does seem to disappear, at least for vacationers. However, the phrase ·no worries· seems odd coming from someone who seems rushed, overwhelmed and, quite frankly, full of worry.

I was in the grocery store when I accidentally bumped the cart of a woman in front of me. She had a crying baby, an overloaded cart and looked as if she was going to cry. When I apologized for bumping her cart, she looked up and said, ·No worries.· It didn·t appear that she had no worries; it actually looked as if, given half a chance, she could have talked for hours about the worries that consumed her. I had to wonder if this woman was so numb to what was happening in her life that she was out of touch or had just grown used to it.

I understand that the phrase ·no worries· actually doesn·t mean that the person saying it has no worries or that that person is wishing the other person no worries. It is just an empty phrase that has become popular like ·Have a nice day· or ·How are you?·

I can·t help thinking what life would be like if one actually had no worries. For me, the biggest cure for worry is action. If I am concerned about an issue, doing something about it helps. Just worrying about it makes me feel helpless. The other cure for worry is to talk it out, preferably with your dog or cat. Most people don·t want to hear your worries, or worse your listener will wallow in them with you. Your pet will just listen, let you get out whatever it is you are worrying about and never speak of it again.

Avoid pat phrases in your speech. Telling someone ·No Worries· or ·No problem· when that is actually not true, or is an empty phrase, is a waste of breath. Practice being aware, and say things that are real and true and that you actually have to think about. Engage your brain and mouth and don·t just go on automatic pilot. As much as I can, I respond with answers to which I have actually given some thought and not just pat answers that mean nothing. For me, it creates more of a connection, even if just for a moment.

Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, PhD provides daily motivation, information and inspiration to thousands of people through her award winning e-zine 365 Days of Coaching.  For a free report, "The Power of Daily Action - How to create more Wealth, Health and Happiness by Tapping Into the Power of Daily Action" go to 
Coach Rachelle Disbennett Lee, PhD, 2007


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